What if nobody shows up? What if I have nothing interesting to say? What if I don't pick the right location? What if the conversation dies? What if I'm not a good facilitator? What if the participants don't connect with me? What if I don't connect with the participants? What if my breath smells? What if it's not fun? What if I'm too awkward? What if they don't find it meaningful?
All of these "what if's" fly in and out of my brain as I think about what lay ahead as a Chat Café facilitator. I'm sure that we will address all of these concerns throughout the course (well, with the exception of the bad breath. I guess that's on me to always carry around a mint). But right now, I carry these worries with me. At the end of the day, what I truly want is for this experience to be meaningful for everyone involved. Meaningful for me as the facilitator as I get to know ESL students navigating the university; meaningful for my fellow classmates as we share our weekly experiences with each other; meaningful for Scott as he guides us through this class; but most of all, meaningful for the Chat Café participants who want to further their conversational skills in English and learn more about American culture.
It is this hope for meaning and purpose that fuels my excitement for this course and squashes all of the worries. I am excited to get to know my peers (both my classmates and conversation circle participants) I may have never met otherwise. I am excited to learn more about myself as a student, a facilitator, and as a lover of language. Above all, I am beyond thrilled to be a (small) part of these students' international experience here at Michigan. I hope to get to know them as people and learners, and I look forward to making connections with them that will hopefully last longer than just this semester.
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