Saturday, November 28, 2015

Blog Post 6


            My experience as a facilitator this semester has not at all been what I was expecting.  I never had a full group meeting and by the end of October, only one girl was coming in spite of my enthusiastic (and increasingly pathetic) reminder emails every Sunday evening.  The most frustrating part was that no one bothered to tell me that they couldn’t make it.  One week, when Heather couldn’t come because she had to go to her professor’s office hours, I sat in the Union by myself for an hour.  This was the low point.  But looking back, there were many, many high points.
            Undoubtedly, the best moment in Chat Café this semester was when Heather came to my parents’ house for Thanksgiving.  We had been talking about American holidays in general and she was telling me that she didn’t have any plans for Thanksgiving, so I invited her to come over and see what it’s like for herself.  Her face just lit up.  She was very polite to my parents and she was really interested in all of the food. We compared Thanksgiving to Mid-Autumn Festival in China since they are both holidays that impose one kind of food on everyone (turkey and moon cakes).  She met everyone who came over to eat and so she got to talk to a lot of new people.  It was so funny to see how interested she was in the food.  The only time she’d had turkey was in sandwich meat form in the dining hall and she’d never had squash or cranberry sauce before.  She took pictures of everything.  I’m really glad that she was able to come.
            My experience with Chat Café was never what I thought it would be (seven people getting to know each other for an hour a week) but that does not mean that it wasn’t meaningful.  I learned so many things I didn’t know about China.  I realized that every email I ignore is the result of someone’s hard work.  I made a friend.
            Even so, if I were going to do this over again, I would change a few things.  I think that I should have been clearer about the fact that I expected them to show up. I almost wish that there were some sort of policy about how you can only miss 2 or 3 meetings unless you have a really good excuse.  I know that this this might make it feel more like a class, but the clubs I’m in here at Michigan all expect their members to attend a certain number of meetings and I think that’s only fair.  I would also think about creating some sort of survey for the participants to fill out before the first meeting about what they want from Chat Café.  It might have been a good idea to get everyone’s phone number and make a group message the first week because I think that emailing is more impersonal and easier to ignore. 
            There are also some things I wouldn’t change about how I ran my group.  One example is that I didn’t choose a conversation topic for each week, but instead just talked about whatever was going on.  I also liked changing up what we did every week while still keeping the meeting place consistent.  We always met on the steps of the Union and from there we walked to several places around town including Zingerman’s, the Natural History Museum and Comet Coffee.  It’s really cool to be able to talk about where you like to drink coffee one week and then spontaneously decide to go there the next week.  I think at the beginning it was really nice for me to be able to bring a deck of cards or some sort of backup plan in case the conversation got really awkward, but I never had to use it.  I also enjoyed the outdoor sessions where we sat in the grass on the Diag before it got cold. 
            Despite some frustration, I would say that this has been a very rewarding experience and I would do it again.  I think the best piece of advice I can give is to be flexible and open to the very real possibility that this probably will not be what you were expecting.  But maybe it will be even better!  

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